Resolutions 2016

This Leonardo meme would probably have sufficed to tell my whole story, but I couldn’t help extrapolating it a little more. I remember what I was doing on 31st December a year ago. I was sitting in front of laptop, contemplating my future, which was looking pretty bleak at that point. As the fireworks went off I could not help feeling a little resentful. God, am I the only one with a shitty life? No, I had nothing to go berserk about. I was regretting how I had wasted 2014 and how little I had accomplished so far. On this 31st December, I am still sitting in front of my laptop, rewinding the whole year in my head. My highs, my lows. My successes, my failures. My prudence, my mistakes. And somehow, I am feeling a bit less bitter. Well, just a tad less bitter than that of last year. But any progress, no matter how negligible it is, is still a progress. So I am definitely improving. I am gradually learning how to live. It’s a tough job and I am miserably lagging behind. But, nevertheless, I am progressing. So here goes my tiny list of resolutions for 2016. I am the biggest critic of myself and I do not have a lot of expectation from me. So let’s see how this new year unfolds for me.

·         Love myself a little more
This is the toughest job ever. We concentrate so much on finding true love etc etc and all sorts of other crap, that we forget to love ourselves. Over the years, I have grown to be an expert at self-loathing. My day starts with cursing myself and ends with an absolute hopeless loser feeling. I need to stop that right away. And thanks to my luck, I have an awesome person in my life who pops up out of nowhere from time to time to point out my flaws and shortcomings. Maybe it’s time to kick his narcissistic ass real hard.
And I really need to take care of my hair and skin. I look like a homeless drug addict these days.

·         Learn to let go
There is a saying that the toughest battle is between what we feel and what we know. Sometimes, it takes days, months or maybe years to finally accept the cold, hard truth. For me, it’s been years I have been struggling with some unresolved issues that have been consuming me very slowly, and painfully. It is time to let that go. I know it is never going to be resolved. I am never going to get a closure. But I need to let it go and move on. And unless and until, I am letting it go, I cannot start afresh. From now on, I am going to try hard to let things go when I know it can never go right. It’s not going to be easy. I am one of those people who like to fight till the last breath and end up severely wounded, maybe with a few lost limbs in the process.

·         Attract less trouble
I don’t know how I am going to keep this promise though. I have a natural knack for trouble. Trouble seeks me out even when I am just minding my own business. I can’t deny that I love the adrenaline rush, but sometimes I find myself in some truly serious pickle due to my total lack of judgement.

·         Control my temper
I am seriously going to do it. And I have already started. Every time I lose my cool, I end up saying something absolutely stupid and tactless. Which, obviously, leads to some serious bad repercussion. This has got to stop.

·         Travel more
This one is an expensive resolution, but still I am going to work hard to maintain it. And three places are on my list this year. Rajasthan, Bhutan and Ladakh.

·         Flirt more. Laugh more.  Read more. And not obsess over things that are out of my hand
I am going to be a carefree geeky bitch this year. Ok I know. Easier said than done. But still.

·         Becoming a prudent shopper
I am not going to splurge mindlessly and end up with a severely mismatched wardrobe. Really, I mean it.

·         Less procrastination
I am going to get things done this year. And that too, in time. No last moment climax drama this year. Haha who am I kidding?

·         Reconcile with a few people
I really need to get over my ego and call up some people.

·         Kicking The Asshole out of my life
It is LONG overdue. And I chicken out every fucking time. But this year, I am going to do it. Actually this resolution is a sub-category of the first one. You start loving yourself more when the poisonous people are out of your life. It’s like detoxifying your soul.

·         Mission Impossible
And this year I am going to embark upon the dangerous mission to find my psychopathic other half. Period. And I think I just broke my resolution of staying away from trouble.

Wish you all a very happy new year!